stepping away...

I don't know why it is, whether it's something particular to my personality type or whether it's more about ministry and the way it works, but I never think more clearly about our community, my role, and direction kinds-of-things than when I am away.
Which is both good and bad...

I love that one day outside of my normal rhythms and routines brings a focus and a kind of 10,000 ft "objectivity" that I just can't seem to get otherwise. I love knowing it's possible to step outside of the regular patterns of ministry and turn around to get a good look at not only what I'm doing but also what I'm not doing... And just think some thoughts about what comes next...
That's the good part.

David Allen says (and I'm trying hard to believe him) that the greatest gift you can give to your future is to be fully present to whatever you are doing right now at this very moment.
As I think about my training, my experience in ministry, I can see a lot of reasons why this is difficult for me. We're given the paradigm of pastor as one so thinks AHEAD, who "casts vision", who leads us into the future... And as I think about our theology and our the ways we've been taught to do ministry, I think I can see why a lot of pastor have trouble being present... at least present to the present. We're all off in the future somewhere thinking about what comes next...

Practically speaking, this means I think some of my best thoughts about my calling and my community at precisely the time when I need to be present somewhere else. Like when I'm in Idaho with my family.
So, all that to say, I'm looking forward to this time with my family, to trying to "turn it off" and being present here and now but finding that for many reasons hard. And I'm looking forward to some personal retreat time next week- time to think these thoughts guilt free, to read, pray and hopefully sit in a hot tub somewhere while I do it :) But now it's time for Jack, Jane and Amy... 
I think Jack and i are going to see Ratatouille today :)