Lots of people talking about Lent- what it means to them, struggling to get it to mean something to them, struggling with the whole idea of giving things up... Why give up bad things for Lent? If they're bad- give them up period. Why give up good things for Lent (like Facebook community, etc)- if they are good, why give them up?
While I have no inclination to pretend expertise here, let me just tell you how I approach Lent, and hope it's helpful for you.
I'm someone who is prone to unthinking attachment.
I jump onto and into things without doing much "counting the cost." Start watching a new show? Cool. Dive into Facebook? Straight ahead. Get a phone with 24-7 access to email, internet, IMs and texts? YES! I subscribe, indulge, sign up and sign on without much intentionality or forethought.
And that gets me in trouble.
Because while I would love to do a million things well, I just can't. And my family and ministry as well as my own soul and its care are what suffers when I say "yes, yes, yes..." and never say no.
So what is Lent about for me?
Learning to say no. It's about detaching from many of the things I have attached to unthinkingly, not because they aren't valuable or are necessarily bad for me, but so that I can look at my life, assess what my real priorities are and begin, when this period is over, to reattach to certain things more thoughtfully. And perhaps, leave some things behind that I'm probably better off without.
Lent is about repentance (changing your mind). I guess I really don't NEED a carmel macchiotto a day, do I? I guess I can't follow 6-10 TV shows- maybe only 2-3. I guess this money would be better off going to the poor, and that time better off going to my family...
At a certain point during the next month (I'm doing some graduated fasting for Lent), I'll even unplug from Facebook and Twitter... why? Why unplug from community?
Because I'm recognizing that community always carries a cost and I want to *know* what it is with social media. Am I so connected to old high school friends and internet e-friends that I'm missing out on the relationships right next to me- friends, relatives, my kids etc? How much of my relational bandwidth is going to social media? Do I talk less to my wife because I talk so much to you? I won't really know unless I take a step back and live without it a bit...
I used to read books. I used to read a lot of books. I don't do that much anymore. Why? Well, before blogs, email, the Drudge Report, Facebook, Twitter, Hulu and the rest, I think I had a lot more time.
What would it be like to have that time again? What good could I do?
I really, really want to know.
"I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good thing, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to any fellow human being let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."
Stephen Grellet, 1773-1855, Quaker Minister
"How much of my relational bandwidth is going to social media? Do I talk less to wife because I talk so much to you? I won't really know unless I take a step back and live without it a bit... "
Dude that's a good hard honest question to ask. I don't think you're alone in this though. I have noticed lately that I can use Facebook as a surrogate for calling people that I have not seen in a long time. It gives the illusion of relationship without actually having to invest anything in the other person.
Posted by: Aaron Stewart | February 25, 2009 at 08:09 AM
I believe that during lent we are invited to assess our desires, examine our motives, and adjust our priorities. It seems that is what you are attempting to do during this season.
Posted by: Liz | February 25, 2009 at 03:30 PM
A very fine post that caused me to reflect on the value of saying "no" to some things in my own life. Thanks very much for posting this.
Posted by: Jim Martin | March 06, 2009 at 06:22 AM