what you wish for...
I used to dream of doing pastoring in such a way that rather than spending 10 of my time with people and 90 percent of my time doing tasks (creating calendars, programming events... just basically trying to justify my paycheck) I would actually spend the majority of my time with people.
People.
Actually, I shouldn't really say that "I used to dream." Perhaps it ended up as a dream, but it really started as a conviction. The conviction was that I was hiding behind tasks and that ministry would be great if it weren't for all the people.
What a wild attitude for a pastor.
Anyway, when I finally came to grips with the fact that deep down, in my heart of hearts that's how I really felt, I began to understand it was time for a change. The problem is, I existed within a system that by and large rewarded the task-based activity and made the people-based activity a low priority (unless you were meeting with people to talk about, recruit for, debrief from a task-related program type thing).
I knew I'd never be able to change unless I first began to change the structure of my own ministry experience. This, in a nutshell, is what lies behind my drive for non-programmatic church, organic church... simple church. Less structural holes in which to drop your time, money and effort. More space on the calendar waiting to be filled with activity that actually matters...
Why do I mention all this, oh blog of mine?
I find myself with four people-related appointments on my calendar today and an unfinished sermon. (Does anyone else find the simplest concepts, like "love each other" the hardest to preach on???)
Today will be a day of listening, of desperately trying to be present to people, straining my ears to hear what God has been doing and saying in people's lives and helping them to discern what the next step might possibly be.
That takes a lot of energy for this INFP. Maybe it's the I (Introvert) in there, but somehow, I now find that though rewarding, spending time with people like this is also my biggest challenge. It takes tremendous energy for me. It takes more out of me than anything I do, including preaching. Give me two appointments during the day, and if we have people over for dinner at night, chances are I'm useless.
I hate being useless.
I hate having people over, or going out to coffee with someone and being in that sluggish, mind-not-really-working, bob-not-really-present-place.
So I guess, all this to say- be careful what you wish for. We talk about our dream jobs, about doing the things that we were put here on earth to do. No one ever said doing your dream job would be a piece of cake or that it would come easy. In fact, doing your dream job may take a lot more out of you than doing that nothing job you hate. It may require more of you, much more of you, than you thought.
Just so you know.
I used to dream of doing pastoring in such a way that rather than spending 10 of my time with people and 90 percent of my time doing tasks (creating calendars, programming events... just basically trying to justify my paycheck) I would actually spend the majority of my time with people.
People.
Actually, I shouldn't really say that "I used to dream." Perhaps it ended up as a dream, but it really started as a conviction. The conviction was that I was hiding behind tasks and that ministry would be great if it weren't for all the people.
What a wild attitude for a pastor.
Anyway, when I finally came to grips with the fact that deep down, in my heart of hearts that's how I really felt, I began to understand it was time for a change. The problem is, I existed within a system that by and large rewarded the task-based activity and made the people-based activity a low priority (unless you were meeting with people to talk about, recruit for, debrief from a task-related program type thing).
I knew I'd never be able to change unless I first began to change the structure of my own ministry experience. This, in a nutshell, is what lies behind my drive for non-programmatic church, organic church... simple church. Less structural holes in which to drop your time, money and effort. More space on the calendar waiting to be filled with activity that actually matters...
Why do I mention all this, oh blog of mine?
I find myself with four people-related appointments on my calendar today and an unfinished sermon. (Does anyone else find the simplest concepts, like "love each other" the hardest to preach on???)
Today will be a day of listening, of desperately trying to be present to people, straining my ears to hear what God has been doing and saying in people's lives and helping them to discern what the next step might possibly be.
That takes a lot of energy for this INFP. Maybe it's the I (Introvert) in there, but somehow, I now find that though rewarding, spending time with people like this is also my biggest challenge. It takes tremendous energy for me. It takes more out of me than anything I do, including preaching. Give me two appointments during the day, and if we have people over for dinner at night, chances are I'm useless.
I hate being useless.
I hate having people over, or going out to coffee with someone and being in that sluggish, mind-not-really-working, bob-not-really-present-place.
So I guess, all this to say- be careful what you wish for. We talk about our dream jobs, about doing the things that we were put here on earth to do. No one ever said doing your dream job would be a piece of cake or that it would come easy. In fact, doing your dream job may take a lot more out of you than doing that nothing job you hate. It may require more of you, much more of you, than you thought.
Just so you know.
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